Moving Elderly Parents: My Story

Moving a parent is a lot easier said than done, which I discovered firsthand in the Fall of 2014. For 59 years, my mother had lived in the Eastern Washington home that my father had built, and she was determined never to leave. After all, her whole life was here.

Eventually, though, she realized it was time to move closer to her family for health reasons. Since I professionally assist seniors and their families through the emotional and physical aspects of relocating, my siblings appointed me as our mother’s moving manager.

It took around three and a half weeks to process her 3,500 sq. ft. home, start to finish. And though moving and storage are my business, it wasn’t until I moved my own mother that I realized how big of a thing it really is to move the people you love.

Negotiating With My Mother

Moving your elderly parent is a very emotional process, and letting go of things after so many years is very traumatic for them. This “stuff” is part of their life and their memories. It’s further complicated by the emotional process that I had to go through also, as this was my childhood home, and it was full of my lifetime of memories, too!

When working with someone else’s family, it’s easier to be more balanced and pragmatic about decisions because you’re not attached to their things. But having to negotiate with my mother and talking her out of keeping things she loved made me sad. I wanted her to have everything she wanted, but it just wasn’t possible. Instead, I explained all the reasons why she didn’t need certain things or how there wasn’t room for them.

My siblings and I just wanted her to be happy. So we got creative and prepared an online photo gallery and shop for all the things she wasn’t taking with her to her new place. We called it GG’s Boutique (after our nickname for Grandma Grace). As we packed things up, we took pictures of literally everything, like classic cookware, glass art, little trinkets, home library books, shop tools, and more.

Not only did this give my mother a place to view her old treasures and relive her memories, but it gave all of her kids and grandkids a chance to find homes for her stuff and hold onto things they wanted to pass down to future generations. All they had to do was click to claim it. If two people wanted the same thing, my mother would draw a name out of a hat. It was that simple.

So while I was packing things up for my mother, I was packing them up for family members, too. It was a very successful project; most of the things she didn’t want to part with have stayed within the family, and she feels very lucky to have passed these things on.

What I Learned About Transitioning

Getting my mother moved was one of my biggest challenges and greatest successes. It’s a fine line between being one’s daughter and moving manager, but I can happily say we made it through the transition gracefully. She now lives in a lovely two-bedroom apartment, and because she made the decision to move herself, I have never regretted transitioning her to new surroundings.

It becomes an interesting adventure when you have to bring your parent through the process. If anything, it has confirmed for me that downsizing and moving is truly a journey through your lifetime a journey that needs to be respected and cherished. I now have a better understanding of the struggles others face and just how deep connections to personal belongings can go and I am better equipped to help them through the process, thanks to my Mom.

Over to You

Have you moved a parent? How did the transition go? Share your experience with us in the comments.